Recently I was “ripping” through the latest issue of Glamour magazine, tearing out all the editorials and innuendos regarding sex because my 16 year old daughter likes to look through the 13 pages left of fashion. I ran across an article entitled “Have More Sex: It’ll Make You a Better Person.” As you can guess, being an abstinence educator, it caught my attention.
The author states that the brain chemical oxytocin is often called the “love hormone” due to its release during intimacy. This I know to be true. I researched oxytocin on www.wikipedia.com and it states “oxytocin released into the brain of the female during sexual activity is important for forming a monogamous pair bond with her sexual partner” (emphasis mine). In addition, the article stated research has found that people given a dose of oxytocin were more giving and sensitive to others. The author concludes with this statement; “A self-improvement plan that requires more sex? Sign us up!”
As parents, family and friends of youth, we have a rich opportunity before us to utilize popular publications such as this as a teachable moment. The pages are filled with numerable examples of the ill-logical thinking (having sex will make you nice) of which our culture has indoctrinated this generation. The time has come for us to openly and honestly talk to our teens about the message the media is portraying to them about sex—and the influence these ideas can have on their thinking and eventually their behavior.
Here are some practical suggestions you can implement. Talk to your teen about how Glamour is marketing towards teens who are not married. Yet this article, and our culture at large, encourages teens to engage in casual sexual activity, chemically bonding (through oxytocin) to several partners before finding their spouse. They make it sound like this kind of sexual behavior will never have any consequences and it’s just a game. Then ask conversation starting questions such as “how well would you expect a marriage to work when the husband and wife have chemically bonded with several other people prior to their wedding night?” Guide them to really think through the information the culture is feeding them and help them to compare it to the truth of Scripture.
Keep your eyes and ears open to these teachable moments and be proactive in helping the teens you love recognize the lies by always pointing them to the truth. Let’s be the ones teaching our kids about true love, marriage, commitment and faithfulness, and ultimately help them attain it for themselves. When our kids know better, they do better. Seize the opportunity today to speak truth into the lives of our youth. Our kids and their futures are worth it!
Tracey Pike, Director of Community Education
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