The Importance of Knowing

For her book, Sex and the Soul, author Donna Freitas surveyed and interviewed students at seven different American colleges and universities representing Catholic, Evangelical, nonreligious private and public institutions. She provides a tremendous body of statistical information about the sexual activities of American college students—statistics which include information about religious identification and religious practice. One finding that is particularly unsettling and surprising is the number of students who see little connection between sex and religion:

“Both Catholic and mainline Protestant students tended to perk up when our discussions turned to what their religious…traditions teach about sex, love and romance, though not in the way one might imagine. In interview after interview, students laughed out loud when asked what their faith tradition might have to say about these matters…at the idea that their faith had anything to say about sex…They laughed because they see religious views about sexuality (at least what they know of them, which is typically not very much) as outdated and irrelevant. And they laughed because they were confused about the prospect of their faith having anything useful to say about these things.”

The Pregnancy Care Center is committed to being proactive in helping both students and parents understand God has much to say about sex, love and romance. His plans, as revealed in Scripture, are far from being useless, outdated or irrelevant. On the contrary, God’s design for sexuality is always in our best interest. Our prayer is that we can assist families in seeing God’s truths as foundational to making healthy decisions regarding their sexuality. In the words of the psalmist, we ask God to, “Open our eyes to see the wonderful truths in your law…You made us; you created us. Now give us the sense to follow your commands….Your decrees are perfect; they are entirely worthy of our trust.” (Psalm 119:18, 73,138 New Living Translation)

At every stage, parents have the responsibility and privilege to challenge, encourage and equip their children to become the people God designed them to be. Much of this equipping involves communicating truth about sexuality so the presuppositions and mistruths of society do not mold their understanding; making sure what they know as they grow are facts based on truth. By their openness and willingness to dialogue, parents can establish themselves as the loving authority—the partner in truth.

Having effective, age-appropriate conversations about sex in loving and spiritually mature ways provides the foundation for students to make wise decisions—even when they are on their own. In fact, recent surveys of college students show that parents can influence their decisions about sex even more than their friends do. (Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our Children by Dr. Joe McIlhaney and Dr. Freda McKissic Bush). Teaching children about healthy sexuality is a continuing process—no matter at what age the dialogue is started. It is never too late to move closer to God’s best. The important thing is that parents seek to know and live out God’s design for themselves, and teach His design to their children.

“Love God with everything you are. Not with just by what you say, but love him desperately with every fiber of your being. God has given us commandments that we are to take so seriously that they become our character. Teach your children the importance of this Godly character. Talk about Godly character when you are just hanging out at home, when you watch T.V., even when you are in the car, up until the time you go to bed and starting again when the alarm goes off in the morning.” Deuteronomy 6: 5-7, Message Paraphrase.

Lisa Newton, Director of Christian Education

Real Life Teachable Moments

Recently I was “ripping” through the latest issue of Glamour magazine, tearing out all the editorials and innuendos regarding sex because my 16 year old daughter likes to look through the 13 pages left of fashion. I ran across an article entitled “Have More Sex: It’ll Make You a Better Person.” As you can guess, being an abstinence educator, it caught my attention.

The author states that the brain chemical oxytocin is often called the “love hormone” due to its release during intimacy. This I know to be true. I researched oxytocin on www.wikipedia.com and it states “oxytocin released into the brain of the female during sexual activity is important for forming a monogamous pair bond with her sexual partner” (emphasis mine). In addition, the article stated research has found that people given a dose of oxytocin were more giving and sensitive to others. The author concludes with this statement; “A self-improvement plan that requires more sex? Sign us up!”

As parents, family and friends of youth, we have a rich opportunity before us to utilize popular publications such as this as a teachable moment. The pages are filled with numerable examples of the ill-logical thinking (having sex will make you nice) of which our culture has indoctrinated this generation. The time has come for us to openly and honestly talk to our teens about the message the media is portraying to them about sex—and the influence these ideas can have on their thinking and eventually their behavior.

Here are some practical suggestions you can implement. Talk to your teen about how Glamour is marketing towards teens who are not married. Yet this article, and our culture at large, encourages teens to engage in casual sexual activity, chemically bonding (through oxytocin) to several partners before finding their spouse. They make it sound like this kind of sexual behavior will never have any consequences and it’s just a game. Then ask conversation starting questions such as “how well would you expect a marriage to work when the husband and wife have chemically bonded with several other people prior to their wedding night?” Guide them to really think through the information the culture is feeding them and help them to compare it to the truth of Scripture.

Keep your eyes and ears open to these teachable moments and be proactive in helping the teens you love recognize the lies by always pointing them to the truth. Let’s be the ones teaching our kids about true love, marriage, commitment and faithfulness, and ultimately help them attain it for themselves. When our kids know better, they do better. Seize the opportunity today to speak truth into the lives of our youth. Our kids and their futures are worth it!

Tracey Pike, Director of Community Education

Become a Lifeline Supporter

Did you know it literally takes thousands of people to make the Pregnancy Care Center ministry viable? Some give to the ministry by offering their specialized expertise. Others contribute their valuable time as a volunteer in one of our centers or another ministry program. But by far the greatest number contribute to the ministry by helping to fund the work. They write a check, fill a baby bottle with change, or raise pledges from family and friends through our Walks for Life or Golf Challenge. Whether they give $5 or $10,000, every person who comes alongside us to provide funding is crucial to making this work possible.

So, for those who want to be part of this exciting ministry, we are pleased to offer a new, more convenient way to make a gift to the Pregnancy Care Center. We can now accept donations online at our website http://www.affirminglifeonline.org, under the "Support Our Work" tab.

While you can go to this page and give a one-time gift, we are especially excited to offer you the opportunity to become a Lifeline supporter by giving a recurring gift. Let me share with you why our Lifeline supporters are such a huge asset to the ministry.

1. Lifeline members provide consistent, stable, monthly income to this life-saving ministry. Regular, dependable income frees up the staff to focus on meeting the needs of clients and sharing the good news with them, rather than having to devote time and energy to soliciting the next donated dollar.
2. Lifeline supporters save valuable resources by cutting the handling costs of staff members manually processing checks. Additionally, by choosing to give online using your checking account rather than a credit card, you save the ministry from having to pay credit card processing fees.
3. Lifeline contributors also help us fulfill our mission by strategically partnering with us on a regular basis. As we think about how to "affirm the value and dignity of every human life," we are able to plan for growth as we build on the solid foundation of a stable income.

If you are looking for a way to make a difference in the lives of people who need the hope and direction that the Pregnancy Care Centers offer, we'd love for you to consider partnering with us as a Lifeline supporter.

Tim Bond, Executive Director

Equipping Teens to Walk in Truth

In light of recent news articles regarding teen pregnancy and the increasing number of states moving away from federally funded abstinence education programs, the importance of churches speaking truth in matters of sexual health and the need to equip parents to dialog with their families at home cannot be emphasized enough.

It is essential students be taught the truth that abstinence until marriage and faithfulness within marriage is the healthiest, best lifestyle choice and unquestionably in their own best interest. However, we must step back and honestly ask ourselves from where teens can be expected to learn this truth—TV? Magazines? Movies? The Internet? My Space or Facebook? Our culture has such a distorted view of human sexuality that few places, if any, outside the home or Christian community exist where a teen can get anything close to an accurate perspective of this significant area of human life.

Research consistently confirms the critical role parents have in their children’s sexual decision-making. In fact, the quality of a child’s relationship with his or her parents is one of the most important influences on sexual decision-making. A new study released by the Partnership for a Drug-Free America and the MetLife Foundation “…reinforces the fact that kids live up to parents’ expectations as well as down to them….what parents choose to discuss with their teens can have an impact on the actions their children take. When parents talk, most teens actually do listen.” (LifeSiteNews.com, 6/10/08).

Sadly, when it comes to discussions regarding sexuality, most parents aren’t talking. There are many reasons for this: embarrassment, shame and guilt from past sexual decisions, fear of not knowing what to say, sexual dysfunctions or relationship struggles of our own, to name just a few. However, none of these reasons are more important than our children. Their futures are worth whatever it takes to equip them to live a life of sexual integrity.

In his book, Talking to Your Kids about Sex, Mark Laaser, Ph.D. states, “…the greatest enemy of sexual wholeness is silence.” As parents, we can combat this enemy by taking advantage of teachable moments at every age and every stage of our child’s development. We do not have to have all the answers, but rather, be willing to put this subject of the table early with our children and keep it there as a topic for open discussion. Our goal is to have a lifetime of effective, age-appropriate conversations with our kids about sex in loving and spiritually mature ways. Equipping them to walk in truth and seeing them live in the freedom truth brings will be the reward.

Give me understanding and I will keep your law and obey it with all my heart.
I will walk about in freedom, for I have sought out your precepts.
Psalms 119:34, 45

Lisa Newton, Director of Christian Education

Tune In on Friday!

This Friday, July 11, is our third annual Care-a-thon on WYGS. Tune in from 6 a.m.-6 p.m. to hear what's happening in the ministry from PCC staff and board members. You can listen online at www.wygs.org or tune in to the F.M. stations 88.1 (Versailles), 89.1 (Greensburg), 94.5 (Salem), 91.1 ( Columbus), or 97.5 (Batesville). You'll also have the opportunity to call in and give a financial gift to the ministry. Set your dial to WYGS today...you won't want to miss this!

We Are Many Parts, But One Body

It's a fact that in order to function properly, any organization must have the necessary input from each member involved. The Pregnancy Care Center is no exception!

I was recently made aware again of the value in each person doing his part, down to the smallest detail, so we can function successfully. The volunteers at our center were having a discussion during some 'down time' about how each one loves what they do, but has little to no interest or enjoyment in what the others are doing! They were amazed at how God brought each one to the ministry for a specific role so we could provide service to our clients.

* One was sorting clothes that had been brought in and another was entering client data in the computer.
* Another was moving from room to room organizing items and putting them in their proper locations.
* Then there's the one who finds enjoyment sitting and tying diapers into dozen bundles so they’re ready to be distributed to clients.
* Another loves to vacuum the center and be sure the shrubs outside the door are trimmed and the plants are watered.
* We also have a volunteer who is our cleaner. She’s energized by going around with a bottle of germ killing disinfectant, wiping down doorknobs and table tops.
* Another feels most comfortable at the copier and carefully prepares our supply of pregnancy packets that we give to our clients.
* We have others who love to tally client numbers at the end of each month and ensure our statistics are accurate.
* Finally, there are those who greet the clients and answer the phone, and others who sit and listen to the client's heart, sharing information about her options regarding her pregnancy.

These are just the volunteers who come each week and serve in the actual center. However there are many more positions outside the center that require each person doing as they feel called and functioning in the area of their gifting and their passion.

Without any one of these faithful servants, there would be a gap in the functioning of this ministry. All are important, and there is a place for you at the Pregnancy Care Center if you are being nudged to join a front-line ministry!

Marge Miller, Jackson County Center Director

Another Woman Finds Healing from Abortion

I took part in the abortion study recently in Shelbyville. I started out in the study thinking that I did not need it and that I had already been forgiven and there was most likely no further blessings there. Well, God in his usual way, used that study to increase my relationship with my 30 year old son--and to show me that my pride and shame had kept me from sharing my abortion and my heart with him in the past. On Mother's Day--I shared with my son about the abortion and it has changed our relationship. We cried together and he shared his heart about some things he had been holding onto. It was a very sweet time that I would not have wanted to miss for anything.

Also another way the study impacted me was in helping me realize the healing power of memorializing those who have gone before us. I work with families in counseling and I find now that I can encourage rituals and memorials as a way of healing and honor in a way that I would not have in the past. Memorializing my unborn child brought the grief cycle full circle and created a reality of the situation for myself and my family. I felt many prayers going up while I was in the study and I just want to say thank you and God Bless You.

DB

The “safe sex” message prepares teens for certain failure!

I looked up the word “safe” on my computer’s thesaurus. I’d like to share with you just a few of the synonyms it gave: secure, protected, out of harms way, harmless, innocent and reliable. Now, consider those same terms in connection to giving teens a condom and encouraging them to cheat on their future spouse. It’s a laughable concept if you give it any real thought, yet many try to advocate the idea as valid.

When teens learn to drive we don’t teach them how to minimize the damage of a future crash because it is inevitable. We give our teens the skills to be successful drivers. Likewise, we must give our teens successful life skills to make wise choices, not assume they will fail to do so. Our Choose to Wait abstinence education program believes in the educational process as well as this generation. We have a deliberate focus and approach of educating teens of not only physical consequences of sex outside the boundary of marriage, but mental, emotional, social and ethical consequences as well. The “safe-sex” message focuses only on attempting to minimize physical risks. There is no “protection” for our mental, emotional, social and ethical bonding that this type of intimacy brings. Abstinence is not a moral issue; it is a medically accurate and scientifically sound fact that participating in sex outside the boundary of marriage is not in our best interest and cannot be made “safe” by any means of protection.

Many believe that “not only are teens having more sex, they are having more unsafe sex.” The first phrase of that sentence is the crux of the problem and the second is the misnomer. If teens are having more sex how does it stand to reason that teaching them to have sex in any way is a solution? Abstinence outside of marriage and fidelity within marriage is not only an attainable and realistic goal, but it is in our best interest. Teaching teens how to choose a second or third best choice is exactly what puts them in an “unsafe” situation. To focus only on the risk of unwanted pregnancy is short-sited. What about the Sexually Transmitted Infection/Disease (STI/STD) rates which are at “epidemic” proportions? The National Institute of Health analysis of the protective factor of condoms found there is no sound evidence to support condoms reduce the risk of acquiring many of the most common STD’s.

Risk avoidance, not risk management is in the best interest of everyone, especially our youth! Education complete with truth, facts and data empower and equip teens to make wise choices, not compromising ones. I am certain that the majority of Americans believe in teaching our teens they are worth more than the compromises the media and our culture would have them make. Please join me in believing in this generation!

Tracey Pike, Director of Community Education

Walking in the Light

“Righteousness and justice are the foundation of Your throne; Lovingkindness and truth go before You. How blessed are the people who know the joyful sound! O LORD, they walk in the light of Your countenance. In Your name they rejoice all the day, And by Your righteousness they are exalted. For You are the glory of their strength, And by Your favor our horn is exalted. For our shield belongs to the LORD, And our king to the Holy One of Israel.” Psalm 89:14-18 (NASB)

We are rejoicing in the Lord and what He accomplished through His faithful servants this past weekend. On Saturday, more than 400 Pregnancy Care Center supporters gathered in three communities to participate in our Spring Walks for Life.

For the past couple of months, our Walk for Life prayer team has faithfully prayed for a beautiful day and God delivered! Even more beautiful to see were individuals from every denomination gathering together to support the life-affirming work of the Pregnancy Care Center. We had walkers from the Baptist, Methodist, Christian, Lutheran, Wesleyan, Church of God, Catholic, Reformed Presbyterian, Church of Christ, and Non-denominational Churches in our communities participate in the walk. With ONE voice we proclaimed to our communities as we walked that God is the Author of life and all life is sacred.

Thanks to our walkers and their generous sponsors, here’s what was raised through these spring walks (so far):
Bartholomew County
$32,376

Brown County
$7,082

Jennings County
$3,435

TOTAL: $42,893

While we just missed our budgeted goal ($45,000), we are thankful for the increase every walk experienced. This is the second year in a row revenue from the walks increased (in 2007 we raised $36,838) which is a huge blessing as we had been experiencing a decline for several years. THANK YOU Walkers! THANK YOU Sponsors! These funds will ensure that the vital life-saving ministries of the PCC can continue in our communities.

If you had planned on walking but were unable to come Saturday, remember it’s never too late to turn in your pledge form. Just mail it to the administrative office at:
Pregnancy Care Center
PO Box 2215
Columbus, IN 47202

Teresa Russell, Director of Marketing

bella

On May 6, 2008, the award winning movie bella will be available for distribution on DVD. Produced by Metanoia Films, this movie was the #1 top rated film of 2007 by the New York Times Readers Poll, Yahoo, and Fandango. It was an honored film winning the People’s Choice Award at the Toronto Film Festival; Best Picture and Best Actor at the 2008 Movie Guide Awards; and the Legacy Award from the Smithsonian Institute’s Latino Center.

Bella is a story of love that goes much deeper than romance. It is a sweetly sentimental story that celebrates life, love, family and relationships. The beautiful Tammy Blanchard plays Nina, an unmarried New York waitress, who loses her job after becoming pregnant. In desperation, she considers abortion her only option.

The restaurant’s empathetic chef is Jose played by the talented Mexican actor Eduardo Verastegui. Jose is an ex-soccer star who gives the young woman emotional support, takes her to visit his loving family and gently tries to persuade her to keep the baby by presenting the option of adoption. Despite appearing rough and shaggy through out most of the movie, Verastegui conveys a gentle warmth and tenderness through his dark Hispanic eyes. Blanchard gives a terrific performance dramatically dealing with difficult and emotionally charged situations.

Director and Co-writer Alejandro Molevede’s heartwarming film portrays Christian values of self-forgiveness, reconciliation and redemption. It addresses sensitive issues with an affirmative pro-life message and has a rather surprising ending. It is a must see film that will be appreciated by adult and adolescent audiences.

For more information on purchasing and promoting this film check out www.lifeisbella.net

Therese Chamblee, Brown County Center Director

Staying Connected

In Ecclesiastes 12:12, the Teacher who wrote the book wisely observed, “Of making many books there is no end....” If the Teacher were alive today, he would no doubt restate that to say, “Of making many blogs there is no end!” The fact is you can log onto the Internet and find zillions of opinions on just about everything. Some thoughts are expressed artfully and well; others amount to nothing more than ill informed ranting. It seems to me, if anyone decides to add to the endless array of available blogs, there needs to be a well defined purpose for it.

When we decided to include a blog element in our new affirminglifeonline.org website, it was with a very distinct purpose. We want everyone who helps us fulfill the mission of Pregnancy Care Centers of South Central Indiana (PCC-SCI) to be completely informed, and to feel connected to the Kingdom work going on here. Our ministry is carried out in four primary places:

• We have six care centers where trained counselors meet with women and men who are making critical life decisions about their family.
• Our Choose to Wait speakers go into schools throughout the region to teach sexual integrity and abstinence to junior and senior high students.
• Transformed is a program carried out in area churches, where the Biblical Truth about God’s plan for human sexuality is taught to teens and their parents.
• Two Bible studies, Forgiven and Set Free and The Path to Sexual Healing are led in confidential locations to help individuals dealing with wounds and scars of their past find God’s grace and hope.

Obviously, because of the far reaching nature of this ministry, not everyone who shares a passion for what we are doing can be completely “plugged-in” to everything going on throughout the ministry. However, we want the people who make this ministry possible to be as informed as they want to be about how we are using the resources they contribute.

Literally thousands of people give money and resources to make the ministry of PCC-SCI possible, many of whom will never be on the “front lines” of what we are doing. Our prayer is that through this web presence you will be able to see the Lord move through this ministry and as the Kingdom expands, God will be honored and you will know you had a part in making that happen. To Him be all the glory!

Tim Bond, Executive Director